The Cloak of Normal
The Hidden Force That Dulls Your Life - And Simple Ways To See Past It
A Brief Introduction to The Cloak of Normal
The cloak of normal drapes itself on the shoulders of the effulgent now. Sometimes its presence feels warm and familiar, like worn in sweatpants. It allows us to move through the day with a sense of surety. Calendar events effortlessly flow in their predicted blocks of time; like flipping the pages of a book. Even “mystery” has a name, so there is no need to investigate further. As a result, the subtle and continuous winds of change remain undetected.
Other times the cloak of normal dulls the sense of aliveness with a stale and salty ‘this again’; as if the world is made of, and even tastes like, unflavored oatmeal. This kind of normal feels unsatisfactory like biting into a bruised banana or putting on a scratchy sweater. We feel bored and even doomed by the overlay of familiar patterns. This staleness leads to a pervading carelessness in our speech and actions towards ourselves and with our loved ones. Because in this musty version of normal, we can’t see our own/their soul; we/they serve only as an idea in the mind, that is not meeting some other idea the mind has conjured up.
The cloak of normal veils the painless nature of bodily experience; the natural ease of breath, digestion, ability to move, drive, fold laundry, laugh, speak, and listen. As a result, the freedom in the body is obscured by sticky webs of beliefs, concepts, and a constant barrage of thoughts and their emotional counterparts. Ensnared, we wiggle and struggle with sincere desperation, and ask the spiders from the future and past to save us. They willingly oblige by wrapping us tighter with should, and shouldn’t have.
The familiarity of the cloak provides a sense of predictability and safety. We keep pulling it closer and closer until spontaneous movement is almost impossible. An opaqueness and rigidity sets in, and our sense of “I” is enveloped.
Yet… there are these moments sprinkled throughout what might otherwise be considered a Thursday; tiny gusts of wind that lift the cloak ever so slightly. A tingling sensation at the top of the head. The full moon shows her giant face, low in the horizon. A crows loud caw startles us. An apple crisp baking in the oven fills the home and our nostrils with cinnamon, sweetness, and something else? The clock strikes 2:22. Someone we were just thinking about calls. A book transports our imagination to a new place. The lightest hint of magic and mystery ruffles the cloak and a fresh aliveness temporarily enters our experience.
Of course, at some point we must be confronted with the change that has been brewing all along, all along, all along; and the cloak is torn violently from our shoulders. Death, or the threat of death — unapologetically reveals the unshakable truth, or lie, depending on how you look at it. The pang of grief, terror, horror and dismay is sharp in its honesty. Things are not as they seem, are they? The mortgage, the schedule, the goals, the to do list, the grievances, the resentments, the dissatisfactions, the hopes and the dreams - there is something more than the personal story isn’t there? Something greater, grander, more powerful and significant to our existence. It occurs to us in this open and vulnerable space that we haven’t truly and earnestly looked.
And when we look, really look, the most revolutionary recognition possible in a human life is revealed: unimaginable and visceral grace, timelessness, wholeness, and a complete absence of fear.
The cloak will come back. The only difference is that you know you’re wearing it.
Ideas For Ruffling The Cloak And Seeing Past It
If you don’t already have one, start a regular meditation practice. TM (Transcendental Meditation) is the easiest and most comprehensive program I’ve come across in my many years of meditating. I’m grateful that Tim Ferris loved talking about it on his podcast, and it was this interview with Jerry Seinfeld (of all people) that tipped the scales for me and led me to taking action to sign up to learn. — Choosing a method that you resonate with (have faith/trust in) and committing time each day WILL lift the cloak.
Thought experiment asking “how am I connected to everything?” There is plenty of evidence in our everyday experience that supports the notion that we are separate - and this exploration is not trying to disprove that - but what is the evidence in your experience that we are not separate? How is your body inseparable from the environment? Where can you find evidence that you are connected to other people, creatures, and nature? Is there anything in your experience that does not really have boundaries? — This particular question - just spending time with it on your own - in my experience, brings unexpected rewards. The first time I really looked into this question myself - researched it and thought about it - then brought it up as a discussion in class back in 2019 - I had a dream the same night like no other dream before - the dream had a visceral and divine theme (a message that I didn’t need to “do” anything to be worthy of love)and when I awoke - the sensation of safety and comfort remained warm in my belly and permeated my environment. The blanket on me rested in perfect balance of weight and softness. The cool November breeze blowing from outside drifted around me like a sweet and loving caress. Even the mattress beneath me felt like it was sinking and holding me just right - and the memory of the dream sat with me too. I felt filled with gratitude and delight. I’ve asked this question to groups since, and without fail, there is an unexpected reward every time. So naturally, I’m curious if the same happens for you. Google it, read articles, think about it, look for it, feel for it, bring it up at the dinner table — see what you find!! Of course, feel free to let me know what you discover, and also if you experience any unanticipated benefits - I want to hear about it!!
Talk to a recommended psychic, medium, or astrologist. There are individuals that have access to realms or information that are not in plain sight. When we engage with these people (trusted and recommended is key) we can get insights into the flow or mystery of our lives. Also, it feels novel and different and just exposes us to a facet that doesn’t feel normal or everyday (especially when our experience is obscured by the Cloak of Normal). — Last month I had the delight of experiencing an oracle session with Kara Potts. It was surprising how accurate her intuitions were, and what came up felt relevant and left me feeling inspired. What I appreciated most was the feeling of being engaged with Kara at threshold of normal everyday and the liminal creative space. I got this big reminder that life is enchanting which led to me developing a fun additional creative writing practice (and more). Something that Kara shared is that “the information definitely comes from somewhere (guides, angels, higher self) for that person at that time”. She has also observed that it is very common that something she shares in a session will have a ripple effect in her clients lives in ways she can’t predict; almost as if the information wanted to find its way to the person. If you have anyone you recommend and trust, feel free to leave their information in the comments!
I may have to write a part 2 or create a series because there are so many ways to connect, invite, and engage with the mystery and dynamic aliveness that tends to be covered by the Cloak of Normal.
With Love,
Nicole